Friday 1 July 2011

Advice to my non-existent offspring.

1. Don't get into cars with people you don't trust. Something my parents told me, and I have adhered to this rule a hell of a lot more than I have with any others. Have you ever had those police officers visit your school and tell you about car accidents? Yeah. Freaked me out. There's only a few people I'll let me drive me around.

2. For the love of God, don't have sex with someone you don't love or trust. And use protection. Enough said.

3. Actually try in school, please. It's hard, when your friends are acting like idiots, and it does look oh so fun. But knuckle down and work hard. From my experience, it does pay off.

4. Don't be afraid of love and heartbreak. But at the same, don't waste your time chasing after people who aren't worth it. I've done this, and it only ends badly. Sometimes you just need to throw in the towel and move on. If I had done this things really would have been so much easier. You know, what doesn't kill you really does make you stronger. And as corny and cliche as it sounds, there are plenty of fish in the sea.

5. It's okay to follow trends, but don't let it stop you from being who you truly are. You're unique, accept that.

6. People are arseholes. There will be arseholes at school, arseholes at work, arseholes at uni. Don't take it personally, it's not you, it's them.

7. If something goes wrong, it really isn't the end of the world. There is no need for a complete mental breakdown, because most of time things can be fixed, or worked through. Everyone has the strength within them to get through anything, so don't make things more of a drama than they need to be.

8. Realise who your real friends are before it's too late. Stay away from the bitches.

9. When you have to sit next to someone on the bus, choose a nice old lady or a guy in a suit.

10. Stay in school, don't do drugs, and try your hardest at absolutely everything you do. Life is a beautiful thing, make the most of it.